Monday Market Open

We’re back, savages.
The week ahead is a blood sport — and you're either playing or getting played. If you listened to last week’s warning bells, you’ve already tightened your stops and sharpened your blades. If not… well, welcome to the Moody’s Chop Zone. The rally’s legs are giving out, and the floor might just give way beneath us.

Market Indices & Commodities

News
TOP STORY: MOODY’S DOWNGRADES U.S. CREDIT

Sunday night futures took a gut punch after Moody’s officially downgraded U.S. credit late Friday. This is the third major downgrade in modern U.S. history:

• 🗓 S&P, Aug 5, 2011 – Market corrected 10%, long, slow recovery followed.

• 🗓 Fitch, Aug 1, 2023 – Same story: 10% drawdown.

• 🗓 Moody’s, May 16, 2025 – Futures dumped on open. The question now: Will history repeat? The stage is set.

We said it last week: the rally’s running on fumes. Don’t be surprised if this is the pin that pops it.

Crypto
BITCOIN SMASHING TO 105K 🚀

While tradfi panics, the degen economy marches on. Bitcoin ripped past $105,000 this weekend. At this point, new all-time highs seem inevitable. This is the escape hatch. Smart money smells inflation, and they’re already hedging.

The week ahead
Notable Shit Happening This Week

Strap in — this week is event dense. Here’s your hit list:

• MONDAY – Moody’s Downgrade fallout begins

• WEDNESDAY – US Crude Oil Inventory

• THURSDAY – S&P Global Manufacturing PMI + Existing Home Sales

• FRIDAY – New Home Sales (April)

• ALL WEEK – 14 separate Fed speakers hit the mic. Expect policy confusion and volatility.

Bond Talk 
🃏 Joker’s Lesson: Bond Yields, Baby

“Ohhh you sweet summer bulls... you think the bond market doesn’t matter?”

Let me paint you a picture!
The U.S. needs to roll over trillions in debt. But rates are sky-high, and Daddy Powell can’t cut — not with inflation peeking through the curtains like a nosy neighbor! Tariffs, trillion-dollar budgets, stonks at the moon? Ha! Rate cuts? Not today, sunshine.

So what’s the punchline?
We need a recession to bring yields down… so we can pretend it’s all okay again!

But until then — the Fed’s stuck, the bond market’s laughing, and you’re the clown juggling tech stocks in a burning circus tent.

“Recession is the only way out? Hee-hee… maybe! Or maybe the whole thing goes kaboom!”

Honk honk.