The Shit to Know Thursdays

Brought to you by VHLA: The League of Players, Traders, and Fuck-Around-and-Find-Out Capitalists.

We're back, baby — no soft landings, no polite hedging, no Bloomberg snobbery. You want signal, not fluff? We got you. Let’s get straight into the juice:

Market Indices & Commodities

Yalla Habibi
Trump Trailblazing in the Middle East

Trump just touched down and started printing legacy. $600B in Saudi commitments. $1.2T from Qatar. And rumor has it he might just end the Ukraine-Russia war while he's at it. Peace through dominance? More like Goat Diplomacy. The old man’s moving like it’s Season 1 of Succession meets Call of Duty. King shit.

Healthcare
UNH Nuked – DOJ on the Hunt

UnitedHealth ($UNH) just got absolutely obliterated — down over 50% in a month as the DOJ drops the fraud hammer.

This is how the stock market wrecks the average trader.

$UNH was already in the middle of a giant controversy. The chart was setting up perfectly — second bear flag in three months, ready to break down...
Instead, the algos rip it to the highs, squeeze every last short, and then comes the execution. Now it's a bloodbath.

Luigi might be laughing last, but most traders? Crying first.

Markets
Market Overview: V-Shape Mirage?

The chart says V. But this ain’t recovery — it’s a retail mirage. Jokers chasing trade deal whispers, but there’s nothing inked.
Meanwhile, bond yields are rising — not what you want when Trump’s master plan depends on refinancing U.S. debt cheap.
Careful out there. This rally could be a setup.

Joker’s Pick
Rocket Lab ($RKLB)

$RKLB is heating up fast.

• $10B market cap

• Cult vibes like $HIMS, $HOOD, $PLTR

• New tech + retail traction = volatility gold

Space is back on the menu. This could be the meme rocket of the next cycle. Joker’s loading up.